Kian's Birth: Fast and Furious

CAUTION: this is a birth story. There will be material that some may find disturbing. If so, please read other postings in this blog.

Kian Tobias was born at 12:46pm on February 23, 2008. He was due February 12th, 2008.



On Friday, Steve and I went into the hospital for a non-stress test and a consult with the ob. I was expecting it to be similar to last time: go in, get the test done, see the ob, get cervidal, go home and come back several hours later in labour. Instead the ob decided that i would be induced in the morning. I had been hoping that I could opt for an artifical rupture of the membranes done by my midwives thus advoiding a transfer of care. unfortunately, the baby's head was still too high for this option. Because of how overdue I was, I was high priority and put on the list for the next day.

I was devastated. And scared and overwhelmed and incredibly stressed. I had wanted a natural birth that included going into labour naturally. I really didn't want a transfer of care. My first birth included a thankfully brief experience with a very bad nurse and I didn't want to go through that again. When I got to the van, I burst into tears and bawled the whole way home. Poor Steve did not know what to do. When we arrived at Steve's parents' house to pick up Zane, I stayed in the car and called my dad. He was out, but I spoke to my sister. She called my aunt and asked her to pray. My aunt called back and left a message, telling us she was praying for us and giving me a passage of scripture to read. I felt so abandoned by God. I felt like God had lied. My mother had been praying for me and felt like her prayers were hitting a ceiling. She was praying specifically that I would go into labour when God stopped her and said that I could go into labour then and have a long hard labour, or i could wait and have a fast labour. She decided to go with waiting and I was okay with that...at least until I hit 9 days postdates. When I found out about the induction, I felt betrayed. Being induced can result in a much harder, longer labour and often leads to more interventions. I did not want any interventions.

I woke up early Saturday morning, and spent several hours talking to God. Eventually I got out of bed, and facebooked my friend Kate to ask her to pray for me. Kate had been my midwife with Zane and is a very good friend. I poured out my fears and told her how I was feeling: stressed, scared and overwhelmed. Then Zane woke up and we had a really good snuggle on the couch. I called the hospital at 7am and they told me to come right in. This was my first answer to prayer, because I could have had to wait and just come in at a phone call's notice. My nerves were not up to playing the waiting game. After a quick breakfast, we dropped Zane off at my in-laws. Before we left, they prayed for us. Next stop was the gas station, where I called my parents and woke them up:) They prayed for us as well. So I was starting off the morning covered in prayer:)

When we arrived at the hospital, I was in a very good mood. I had woken up my midwife, so had brought really good tea for us to drink. As they were getting me set-up, I was laughing and joking with my midwives. Chantal (my student midwife) told me that we had a really good nurse and what to expect. My nurse, Amber, came in and was introduced to us. Then they started the iv and the paperwork, with Amber asking how I wanted to labour, filling out the paperwork and attaching the monitors. At 9 am the ob, Dr. Oliver, broke my membranes and started the oxytoxin.

When my water broke, there was meconium present. Meconium is the baby's first poop and is a thick, tar-like substance. When there is meconium present in the amniotic fluid, the main concern is that the baby may have aspirated it into his/her lungs. This hasn't been an issue at either of my other births, so it was a new experience for me. I really experienced God's peace at this point. Steve had no clue about the ramifications, but I did. Instead of getting scared, I quietly asked Steve to email his parents and ask them to pray. The hospital has wi-fi and Steve's parents had gotten a blackberry the day before. So he emailed them, and they called my parents. Apparently, I had the same complication when I was born, so my parents were very aware of the potential seriousness. They called their church and had me put on the crisis prayer chain. And both of our families continued to pray for us.

I sat on the bed for awhile, and then switched to the labour ball. At this point I started having light contractions. Kian was in a position that made monitoring him awkward. After many tries and switching belts several times, we finally settled on me holding the monitor in place. If i didn't keep pressure on the monitor, it would stop picking up the baby's heartbeat. I laboured on the ball for probably close to an hour, chatting with my midwives, the nurse and Steve. It was very pleasant. My contractions continued to get stronger, and eventually I asked to labour in the tub. This is my favourite way to labour. I love baths. They make me happy:)

I got in the tub at 10:45am. The water was nice and warm and I was actually able to stretch out in the tub and be very submersed. By watching the monitor, I could tell that I was relaxing more in the tub. Steve sat on the edge, holding my hand and we chatted while I drank my tea. The longer I stayed in the tub the harder and closer the contractions came. This was another area where I experience God's peace. My contractions tend to be very close together and involve lots of back pain. The oxytoxin served to intensify this. But during my contractions, I stayed very calm, closing my eyes and breathing deeply. My midwife kept telling me that I was doing a really good job and that she was proud of me. I stayed in the tub somewhere between 30 and 45 minutes. When I got out, I felt like I was in transition. Even though I was warm, I had started shaking and felt nauseous. My contractions were so close together, I couldn't dry myself off. A contraction would end, I'd start to move and have to stop again. But when they checked me, I was only 4 cms dilated. This was another example of God's peace and protection. Normally, that would have made me very discouraged. Instead, I was surprised but felt that it would change soon.

About 30 minutes later, I felt like I needed to use the bathroom. So I sat on the toilet, and while there started feeling like I needed to push. When I got off, I was near tears. There was so little break in the contractions, and I was having trouble maintaining my control. At this point, the nurse asked me if I wanted some pain relief. All that had been going through my mind for the last ten minutes was " I just want some tylenol". I gave her a definite yes. Although I wanted a medication free birth, I also knew I needed something. By that point, my care team figured that the oxytocin was too high, but were having trouble monitoring my contractions. So they had to adjust the belt again, and wait for about 20 minutes before they could turn it down. Amber left and got the demerol. She asked me where I wanted the shot, in the leg or the hip. I responded that I didn't care, as long as I didn't have to move. So she injected me in the leg. By the way, demerol hurts! It also makes you really dizzy. My leg still feels like it's bruised. I had the demerol at 12:02pm.

When I said I didn't want to move, Sky said that I had to move. So they helped me slowly shift onto my hands and knees, leaning on a labour ball. I had been keeping my eyes closed during contractions, but had to keep them closed constantly, since the room started to spin if they were open. Chantal grabbed my "magic" calm down lotion, and started massaging the base of my spine where the contractions hurt the worst. Steve held my hand and rubbed my back. At 12:20, Steve emailed his dad saying that it would be awhile..hahaha...

I started feeling like I had to push. So I was bad. During my contractions, I started doing little tiny pushes. I knew I wasn't fully dilated, but pushing helped me feel better. I started feeling much more pressure and told my care team. They checked me and I was 9 cms dilated. 3 minutes later, I was fully dilated. At this point, things started happening. Amber had run out and paged the pediatrician, Sky, some nurses and Dr. Oliver. All of a sudden, there were people in the room setting up. It was a little amusing how fast they moved. The bed was dismantled and the stirrups put up so I could push. One of the more interesting things was that Dr. Oliver was explaining different things to Chantal, the student midwife. I"m interested in midwifery, so I enjoyed listening to her explanations. Kian was posterior(face-up), so Dr. Oliver flipped him. That was a painful experience. I don't recall feeling my other children's crowning so intensely. After he flipped, I pushed and he crowned. Someone told me they could see a head of dark, curly hair. I pushed some more, and then I was told to stop so they could unravel the cord from around his neck. Stopping pushing in the middle of a contraction is very close to impossible. Thankfully it didn't take too long. Then I could push again. He came out very quickly, and I heard him cry. Steve told me we had a boy, and I said "hello Kian". It was 12:46pm.

Then the nurses grabbed him and whisked him over to the bassinet. His apgar score was quite low(2), and they intubated him and cleaned him up. Thankfully there was no meconium in his lungs, only in his stomach. Praise God! The nurse brought him over for me to see. My first thought was how much he looked like his brother did at birth. After letting me hold him for a few minutes, he was taken to NICU for observation. Steve went with Kian and left me alone to get stitched up. He also emailed his parents the happy news, but asked them to keep praying. I started getting weepy at this point. I really wanted my husband and baby. It didn't help that I was quite tired and dizzy at this point. I started falling asleep, and decided that was a good idea.

At some point Steve came back and his sister showed up. She works in the hospital and he paged her after Kian was born. She chatted with me briefly and then went with Steve to see Kian. I went back to sleep. Thankfully Kian was released from NICU much sooner than expected. He had a really good nurse and then we just waited to be released.

I went home knowing that God is good. I checked my email and found what my friend had wrote on my wall. She prayed this beautiful prayer for me:

Grace, I pray that the Holy Spirit would cover you and the baby today, that your body would work in harmony and unity of purpose with the baby. O Father, let Your PERFECT LOVE be the only thing to "overwhelm" Grace today!!! Breathe your peace into her entire being as she prepares to birth this precious and long-awaited little baby! Set your Angels to keep guard all around Grace and Steve and the Baby and the midwives and doctors. Let the profound awareness of Your Presence, and Your Goodness drive out every fear and anxiety from her heart and mind. Let her mind and her heart and her body be obedient and give her a childlike Trust in Your faithfulness, and the grace to trust her body, which You created in wisdom and love for exactly this time and place and purpose! Give her the grace and the strength and the endurance to bring this amazing little person to birth TODAY Lord!

God answered it in so many ways. Kian's birth was the fastest of my children. God protected him so much and God also protected me. Kian will be a week old tomorrow and he is a very healthy little boy. I have struggled with knowing that God is good over the course of this pregnancy. He keeps reminding me that He is, but the last several weeks were very very hard. Kian's birth was such a huge example that God is good and He keeps His promises. Weeks ago, we finally chose a boy's name. I chose the middle name and then Steve found a first name. Tobias, the name I chose, means God is good.

Thank you so much to everyone that prayed for me. It meant a lot:) Oh, and my care team was amazing. Before I got the demerol, I was starting to lose control and Sky started talking me through my breathing. She calmed me down soo much and enabled me to make it through. Chantal was wonderful too. And even in the midst of the intenseness of the ending, we were able to laugh:) Thanks so much, Sky, Amber and Chantale:) Kate, thanks so much for your prayer support. The same to my mother, sister and aunt. i could keep going...